abuse of freedom

It was much easier to write about changing my diet, away from all the unhealthy animal based foods and toward plant based eating. Admitting in this forum that I had spent years eating way too much BBQ and fast food wasn't too bad, I mean, yes I realize fully now how badly I had treated my body with food, but that's a lot of people, right? Eating the standard American diet is something that obviously tons of people do openly and routinely, where's the shame? Besides, switching to a plant based diet felt pretty hip.

Writing about my own addiction issues, by comparison, feels pretty lousy, in some respects. It makes me confront my selfishness and shame. Maybe in years to come I'll have some distance from all those years of deceit and abuse and just remember the joy of being set free. I don't feel like there is anything noble about not being a nicotine addict anymore, but for sure there is a subject worthy of praise in all of this - Jesus. He alone has freed me, and He alone deserves credit for my deliverance.

In recent days, my guiding verse has been Galations 5:13, which reads, "For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another." When I was acting on my addiction, I understood that I was free to do so, and I was in fact. Sometimes I would play the comparison game at church, and look at people who apparently felt free to indulge over much in food. Or, I figured out of all these people at church, plenty were divorced or looking too longingly at folks other than their spouse - surely I wasn't any worse than any of those people, right? Turns out exactly none of that matters to how I exercised and experienced my own freedom. I was abusing my freedom, robbing myself of an abundant life, and cheating those around me by not being all I could be, as a free person in Christ. Anyway, my daily prayer now is that He would enable me to use my freedom to serve others. Its some hard days still, here and there, but I wouldn't trade it.

If you are struggling with some kind of addiction or pain, I'd truly love to pray for you. Message me on Facebook or email me at artmarck@yahoo.com.




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